How to conquer the legendary Ivanhoe-Mills Quest, Orlando's most savage bar crawl

Noon: White Wolf Cafe

1829 N. Orange Ave., Sat: 8 a.m. - 10 p.m. Sun: 8 a.m. - 3 p.m.
What to order: Snag a Chipotle Bloody Mary and energize with a gourmet coffee
So, you’ve finally decided your wits need a solid testing. Perhaps you are capable of knocking this 4-kilometer drink-cathalon out of the park, it’s too early to tell. Nonetheless, let us first get some breakfast in before truly toeing the line of acceptable public inebriation. If the wait is long, as this spot is known to produce a line, then run north to your second stop during the delay to snag a quick pre-meal liquified snack.

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12:10 p.m. Ivanhoe Craft Bar and Packy

1915 N. Orange Ave., Sat: 2 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 2 p.m. - 12 a.m.
What to order:The craft cocktails menu is constantly rotating and they are $2 off before 8 p.m.
Whether you follow or precede your White Wolf feast at Ivanhoe’s comfy little packy, you should be pleased with yourself because few have made it to step two of this quest ... as you are likely the first to embark on it.

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1:20 p.m. Caboose

1827 N. Orange Ave., Sat: 12 p.m. - 2 p.m. Sun: 12 p.m. - 2 a.m.
What to order: The day’s first tallboy and/or pint
The food is aiming to sit now, so it's time for you to make something of yourself by siphoning some liquid dessert down your esophagus. In layman's terms, just order a beer and slam it, you’ve got places to be.

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1:38 p.m. Imperial Wine Bar

1800 N. Orange Ave., Sat: 5 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: Closed
What to order: Sixpoint Crisp Pilsner is a safe place to start here
If this fine establishment be closed, as is likely if you are following our tightly designed time frames, then just double up the drinkage at the Lucky Lure, por favor.

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1:47 p.m. The Lucky Lure

1427 N Orange Avenue, Sat: 12 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 12 p.m. - 2 p.m.
What to order: You won’t regret acquiring a Regal Beagle
Hike those knees and trudge further south where you take the bait and bite on one of the cocktails at this quick stop. Breathe friend, and get that hook out of your lip, cuz’ once this cockt ail is caput, then it’s time to sail away.

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2:05 p.m. Nova

1409 N. Orange Ave., Sat: 10 a.m. - 2:30 p.m. & 5 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. Sun: 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. & 5 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.
What to order:An Ivanhoe Punch will keep your senses sharpened
Hit Nova hard with as much composure as you can muster, a mere 2 hours and 4 or more drinks into your quest, and make it brisk, because this place closes for dinner prep at 3 p.m.

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2:58 p.m. The Hammered Lamb

1235 N. Orange Ave., Sat & Sun: 10 a.m. - 2 p.m
What to order:The Highland, because you should drink how you are beginning to feel
Now might not be a terrible time to add some delicious matter to your stomach, if you have not done so yet. If you have and are wanting to burn off some carbs fast, call dibs on one of the ping-pong tables and give the public an inebriation spectacle to gawk at.

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3:26 p.m. German Backhaus

1213 N. Orange Ave., Sat & Sun: 8 a.m. - 6 p.m.
What to order: Obtain a pretzel
Get some starch in your system as you turn the first corner in your walk down Inebriated Lane before you head up to Alden Road for your next stop.

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4:01 p.m. Hideaway Bar

516 Virginia Drive, Sat: 7 a.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 9:30 a.m. - 2 a.m.
What to order: Stella Artois pints
The first stop on the second act of the quest to forget is well-hidden and points you east toward an era of browning out, but stay strong, for you are not even halfway through your journey.

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4:41 p.m. GB's Bottle Shop and Tasting Bar

521 Virginia Drive, Sat: 12 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 12 p.m. - 11 p.m.
What to order: The world is your oyster here, but any draft beer will do
Leave the more clumsily inclined members of your troupe outside as there are many breakables inside this beer grocer. GB’s is a nice spot to recuperate away from the bar scene, so snag a quick brown-bag special and walk out to your next pit stop of drank.

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5:21 p.m. The Thirsty Topher

601 Virginia Drive, Sat: 2 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 2 p.m. - 12 a.m.
What to order: A tallboy should help maintain the current flow of your roll
After that quick break from the bar scene it's time to stumble a little bit further east to this hole in the wall that will help ease you back into the bar scene with grace. Snag a tallboy, slam it and stroll out the door.

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6:26 Nora’s Sugar Shack

636 Virginia Drive, Sat: 2 p.m. - 7 p.m. Sun: Closed
What to order:Beer and a donut please
Head into Nora’s Sugar Shack for a quaint and fragile second while again leaving the clumsy members of your party outside, for Quest-ruining expenses could arise from a destructive episode of slapstick comedy within.

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7 p.m. The Matador

724 Virginia Drive, Sat: 7 p.m. - 2 a.m. Sun: 7 p.m. - 2 a.m.
What to order: Gin and tonic on tap
This well-rounded watering hole is easy to get a drink at, as the bar rarely has a competitive vibe. Snag yourself a gin and tonic on tap, because where else are you going to be able to order that?

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7:29 p.m. Santiago’s Bodega Orlando

802 Virginia Drive, Sat & Sun: 10 a.m. - 2 a.m.
What to order: Some sort of sangria
If you’ve made it this far on your journey then you’ve earned a toast to yourself. Flaunt the pinky until you pass the exit, but until then, enjoy these 30 minutes of high society.

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8:10 p.m. Ten10 Brewing Company

1010 Virginia Drive, Sat: 11:30 a.m. - 1 a.m. Sun: 11:30 a.m. - 10 p.m.
What to order:Ten10’s Urban Trail American Pale Ale simply cannot fail
Down a pint and compose yourself. We're about to make some twists and turns on our next few moves, so check your shoelaces and those of your drinking buddy, because we don’t want to lose anyone while crossing the Urban Trail.

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8:27 p.m. The Brass Tap

1632 N. Mills Ave., Sat: 12 p.m. - 1 a.m. Sun: 12 p.m. - 11 p.m.
What to order: North Coast Old Rasputin Nitro
Take yourself north toward the Brass Tap where the kegs are always freshly tapped and where you're sure to help erase a majority of the failure that was projected for your short life by lady Dinah, the fortune teller, on your way to this bar.

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8:40 p.m. Quantum Leap Winery

1312 Wilfred Drive, Sat: 12p.m. - 8 p.m. Sun: Closed
What to order: A glass of rosé
Time jump in your journey and head back the way you came toward Quantum Leap, where you can attempt traveling to a time where you are drunker than you were 30 minutes ago.

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9:12 p.m. St. Matthew's Tavern

1300 N. Mills Ave., Sat & Sun: 4 p.m. - 2 a.m.
What to order:Rum and coke, or your own twist on that
Zoidberg across the Pig Floyd’s parking lot and turn right until you see sandy dunes, then walk into the attached bar and order a Red Bull and vodka, 'cuz you’ve just about hit the home stretch, and you will likely need the stamina boost at this point.

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9:59 p.m. Black Rooster

1323 N. Mills Ave., Sat: 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. & 5 p.m. - 11 p.m. Sun: 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. & 5 p.m. - 9 p.m.
What to order:Snag a pork-fat taco and thank us later for the tip toward enlightenment
There are a few beers you can scoop here, but the focus of this stop is the beautifully crafted cuisine that we are sure anyone in your party with a brain will appreciate.

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